Starbucks is closing 600 stores. This is going to be very inconvenient for a lot of people.

They may actually have to walk across the street to the other Starbucks.

                                                                                               - Alex Kaseberg

The economy is looking bad. You know how bad it is?

In Beverly Hills women are firing their nannies and having to learn the names of their own children.

That's how bad it is.

- Jay Leno

Happy Birthday to Kenny G. He turned 53 years old yesterday.

He had a big birthday party in one of New York's hottest elevators.

- Jimmy Fallon

At the Summit of the Americas, the leaders of Cuba, Nicaragua,

and Venezuela all agreed that capitalism will destroy the planet.

Then they all hopped in their private jets and returned to their huge palaces.

                            - Jay Leno

California Governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, says it's time to consider legalizing marijuana.

University of California says they may start a marijuana research center.

Really? I thought the University of California was a marijuana research center.

                                                                                         - Jay Leno

The Post Office announced that the price of a stamp is going up to 44 cents.

This is getting out of control. If there were just some other way to send written messages

that were free and a million times faster. If you guys think of something, e-mail me.
                                                                                                - Jimmy Fallon

This week marks the 54th anniversary of the invention of the credit card.

Before that, people practiced something called "living within their means"

          - a foolish, foolish, outmoded way of life.

                                                                                        - Jay Leno

Rasmussen organization has just released the results of its language poll.

When asked if English should be America's official language, 85 percent of the people said, "Sí."

- Jay Leno